You Shouldn’t Feel that Way!

How many times has someone come up to you when you were feeling bad or mad or frustrated and a friend, in attempts to help you says:  You shouldn’t feel that way.


Oh, man, why of course.  Sure.  That really helps a lot.  A moment ago you were feeling terrible and now comes Johnny Genius and explains how you shouldn’t feel that way and now that he said it, all of a sudden you feel 100% better.

Of course, this is total nonsense.

Feelings are feelings.  No, they are not really directed or controlled by thought per se, but then again feelings are not values that can be judged as right or wrong.  In other words, you feel what you feel:  your emotions don’t care about the morality of them, only that they feel.

Yes, of course, you shouldn’t feel that way.  Heck, you already knew you shouldn’t feel that way, but there is nothing really you can do about it for any given immediate timeliness.

Over time one can direct their energies and thoughts towards positive relationships and actions and in response, our feelings will become redirected, but for the short term, if you feel bad, in all likelihood, your life is going to suck in respect to pathos.

So then, I’m sure our friends mean well for us and in describing our disposition, there is more than likely a good reason to upgrade and feel good if we are out of sorts.  However, a simple platitude of how we should feel isn’t going to help at all.  And no, we realize we shouldn’t feel that way at all.  Thank you for your assistance.


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